I was thrilled to receive some really excellent questions from a reader on this post that I’d like to answer in greater detail.
The original comment was as follows:
If you don’t mind getting personal, I have a question for you: Did your father (or parents) prepare you during your entire childhood for a betrothal? Did you have any ideas or expectations that you should “fall in love” before marriage? Were you permitted to watch movies (like Disney movies or Jane Austen)? If so, did this impact your feelings or beliefs about romantic relationships before marriage and did your parents actively counter this? Obviously you don’t have to answer if you don’t want, or maybe you can do another blog post about it. 🙂
Let’s Talk Courtship!
After I announced my marriage on an old blog of mine, a young woman commented,
“I want to know more about how you got married! What do you think about courtship?”
In American culture there are really only two romantic relationship options that most people know: dating and courtship; so it’s not surprising that people are confused when someone uses a different term (i.e., “betrothal”) to describe how they got married. It raises eyebrows, and questions are sure to follow.
So today, I’m going to publicly answer that question I received two years ago.
In true homsechooler fashion…
…all ages mingled together as our two families stood around the kitchen talking. Having two unmarried 19-year-old girls (one of whom was myself) in the room, the conversation predictably turned in the direction of romantic relationships. Mrs. R. shared her concern that her children wouldn’t be able to have relationships with the opposite sex without having romantic thoughts towards them, and posed the question, “how are they supposed to treat others as only brothers and sisters in Christ?”
Without thinking, I blurted out, “I don’t think that’s possible.”